WEBVTT 00:00.884 --> 00:03.634 (dramatic music) 00:10.715 --> 00:13.298 (upbeat music) 00:32.700 --> 00:35.853 It's December 7th, 2004. 00:36.720 --> 00:41.310 I'm driving perhaps a little too fast in my Toyota RAV4, 00:41.310 --> 00:43.950 and I'm taking my kids to a party, 00:43.950 --> 00:45.330 a party my students are hosting 00:45.330 --> 00:47.550 for the end of the year holiday celebration. 00:47.550 --> 00:50.040 Nicholas, six years old, Tanner's four, 00:50.040 --> 00:51.330 and Jackson's just three months, 00:51.330 --> 00:52.860 and they're sitting in the backseat. 00:52.860 --> 00:55.290 Nicholas is teaching Tanner The Dreidel Song. 00:55.290 --> 00:58.020 I'm bringing the ham as the main dish for the party. 00:58.020 --> 00:59.730 So the whole car smells like clothes. 00:59.730 --> 01:01.930 And I got the point setter on the front seat 01:02.940 --> 01:03.963 and the phone rings. 01:05.280 --> 01:06.303 It's my mother. 01:08.340 --> 01:12.753 And she says, "Our worst fears have been confirmed. 01:14.400 --> 01:16.257 Your brother has died by suicide." 01:18.630 --> 01:20.430 Now, six months before, 01:20.430 --> 01:23.010 my brother had been on top of the world; 01:23.010 --> 01:27.513 a successful businessman, a loving husband and father, 01:28.590 --> 01:29.460 many, many friends. 01:29.460 --> 01:30.450 He was the pied piper. 01:30.450 --> 01:33.060 Everybody would follow him anywhere. 01:33.060 --> 01:35.160 But my brother had an invisible disability 01:36.000 --> 01:40.023 and that was he harbored the demons of his bipolar illness. 01:41.160 --> 01:42.850 He hid them from everybody 01:44.280 --> 01:46.180 and they ultimately prove to be fatal. 01:47.250 --> 01:49.170 Just one week before his death, 01:49.170 --> 01:51.660 my brother and I sat down to have a chat. 01:51.660 --> 01:54.120 I had just read the book, "The Unquiet Mind" 01:54.120 --> 01:56.173 by Dr. Kay Redfield Jamison, 01:56.173 --> 01:58.350 who in her own beautifully written memoir, 01:58.350 --> 02:02.280 chronicles her own fight against bipolar illness, 02:02.280 --> 02:04.410 her almost near fatal suicide attempt, 02:04.410 --> 02:06.780 and most importantly, her recovery. 02:06.780 --> 02:08.790 And I said, Carson, look, 02:08.790 --> 02:10.980 here's this other very accomplished public person 02:10.980 --> 02:12.617 just like you. 02:12.617 --> 02:14.580 She's gotten better. We can figure this out. 02:14.580 --> 02:16.983 There's hope, there's hope, there's hope. 02:18.390 --> 02:20.167 And he looked at me and he said, 02:20.167 --> 02:23.247 "But Sally, it's madness." 02:24.150 --> 02:27.123 And less than a week later, he was dead. 02:28.770 --> 02:31.170 Now, I don't know exactly what he was trying to tell me 02:31.170 --> 02:33.030 in that conversation, but I have a pretty good idea. 02:33.030 --> 02:36.600 He was an incredibly determined man that was bound 02:36.600 --> 02:38.910 and determined to get through all obstacles in his life. 02:38.910 --> 02:41.280 And I believe in my heart that he would've fought 02:41.280 --> 02:44.010 to get well if he knew when he got to the other side 02:44.010 --> 02:46.440 of this long, dark night of the soul, 02:46.440 --> 02:48.120 that he could have his life back, 02:48.120 --> 02:51.600 that he could have the respect and dignity that he deserved. 02:51.600 --> 02:53.970 And I believe he lost that hope. 02:53.970 --> 02:56.643 And that makes me so mad. 02:57.960 --> 03:02.010 It makes me mad that someone with a treatable health issue 03:02.010 --> 03:04.140 like bipolar illness has also, 03:04.140 --> 03:06.750 not only to deal with the unbearable psychological pain 03:06.750 --> 03:07.650 that comes from that illness, 03:07.650 --> 03:09.900 but also all of this discrimination, 03:09.900 --> 03:12.270 misperception, and prejudice. 03:12.270 --> 03:13.200 On the night that Carson died, 03:13.200 --> 03:15.667 his good friend called my brother's wife and said, 03:15.667 --> 03:16.980 "Oh my God, what can I do?" 03:16.980 --> 03:17.827 And she said, 03:17.827 --> 03:21.270 "No matter what you do, don't let him be forgotten." 03:21.270 --> 03:23.700 So the seeds for the Carson J. Spencer Foundation 03:23.700 --> 03:26.190 were planted on the night of my brother's death. 03:26.190 --> 03:28.290 By January, this man had convened 03:28.290 --> 03:29.730 all of my brother's closest friends 03:29.730 --> 03:32.100 from across his lifespan and our family. 03:32.100 --> 03:34.850 And in our grief reaction, we resolved to do something. 03:35.910 --> 03:38.160 We were gonna find bold gap filling ways 03:38.160 --> 03:39.660 to prevent what happened to Carson 03:39.660 --> 03:41.310 from happening to other people. 03:41.310 --> 03:42.570 And we were also gonna do this 03:42.570 --> 03:44.790 in a way that celebrated my brother's life 03:44.790 --> 03:47.943 through innovation, vision, and entrepreneurship. 03:48.870 --> 03:51.810 Fast forward over a decade later, 03:51.810 --> 03:54.900 and we are now known as leaders in suicide prevention 03:54.900 --> 03:56.790 and in innovation. 03:56.790 --> 03:59.670 And one of the things that I'm particularly passionate about 03:59.670 --> 04:03.300 is positioning this issue as a social justice issue 04:03.300 --> 04:05.190 and as a social movement. 04:05.190 --> 04:06.930 So that's what we're gonna talk about today. 04:06.930 --> 04:09.060 How do we shine the lights 04:09.060 --> 04:10.320 and illuminate the path 04:10.320 --> 04:12.960 to make this social movement a big part? 04:12.960 --> 04:15.570 The social movement of our generation? 04:15.570 --> 04:17.430 So the three lights that I'll share with you today, 04:17.430 --> 04:19.710 number one, we gotta shine that light on ourselves. 04:19.710 --> 04:21.120 Each of us was brought in a culture 04:21.120 --> 04:23.970 where these same misperceptions are formed and cultivated. 04:23.970 --> 04:26.520 We gotta unpack that and look at 'em. 04:26.520 --> 04:29.940 The next light we gotta shine is how do we illuminate hope? 04:29.940 --> 04:32.940 How do we cultivate hope in people, in systems, 04:32.940 --> 04:35.970 and communities so that people can hang on 04:35.970 --> 04:38.370 when life challenges come their way? 04:38.370 --> 04:41.460 And then finally, how do we enroll and enlist 04:41.460 --> 04:43.694 a wider circle in our effort? 04:43.694 --> 04:45.660 The people who usually show up for these things 04:45.660 --> 04:47.040 are people like me, 04:47.040 --> 04:49.020 people who have been bereaved by suicide. 04:49.020 --> 04:50.940 Sometimes mental health providers show up. 04:50.940 --> 04:51.773 And more recently, 04:51.773 --> 04:53.790 larger numbers of suicide attempt survivors 04:53.790 --> 04:57.112 and their families are showing up carrying the flag. 04:57.112 --> 04:58.680 We are a determined group. 04:58.680 --> 04:59.670 We are a feisty group. 04:59.670 --> 05:00.990 We are a smart group. 05:00.990 --> 05:02.370 We are a mighty group. 05:02.370 --> 05:03.660 And we are a small group, 05:03.660 --> 05:05.640 or at least the ones that are out. 05:05.640 --> 05:08.370 So we need to enroll and enlist other leadership, 05:08.370 --> 05:10.950 other people, other voices, other energy 05:10.950 --> 05:12.300 to really create the social movement 05:12.300 --> 05:15.120 that's needed to create the change that we want. 05:15.120 --> 05:16.758 So let's start with ourselves. 05:16.758 --> 05:19.833 The very first thing we need to do is unpack those beliefs. 05:19.833 --> 05:20.907 Many of us harbor beliefs 05:20.907 --> 05:22.080 that we don't even know 05:22.080 --> 05:24.570 are getting in the way of doing this work. 05:24.570 --> 05:26.760 I'm gonna throw out three provocative things to think about. 05:26.760 --> 05:29.280 And as I do, just do that internal self check. 05:29.280 --> 05:31.140 Do I believe that? Do I not believe that? 05:31.140 --> 05:33.000 Why am I pushing against that? 05:33.000 --> 05:34.140 What do I really think? 05:34.140 --> 05:38.343 The first one, suicide is preventable. 05:39.180 --> 05:40.889 Suicide is preventable. 05:40.889 --> 05:42.720 There is a national movement right now 05:42.720 --> 05:45.720 called Zero Suicide, zero. 05:45.720 --> 05:47.730 That's the number we're going for 05:47.730 --> 05:50.430 because what other number is appropriate? 05:50.430 --> 05:52.080 But you should hear the kind of pushback 05:52.080 --> 05:53.077 we get from that zero. 05:53.077 --> 05:55.140 "Oh, no zero's not possible. 05:55.140 --> 05:57.060 How could we ever get to zero?" 05:57.060 --> 05:58.830 Well, think about that. 05:58.830 --> 06:02.587 We have evidence now when large behavioral health systems, 06:02.587 --> 06:05.580 when their leadership and their practices 06:05.580 --> 06:09.120 commit to continuous improvement going to zero, 06:09.120 --> 06:13.950 lo and behold, suicide numbers drop drastically. 06:13.950 --> 06:15.090 It's a mind shift. 06:15.090 --> 06:17.280 And when your mind shifts to it is possible, 06:17.280 --> 06:19.290 all kinds of things happen. 06:19.290 --> 06:23.340 So what if suicide were completely preventable? 06:23.340 --> 06:25.090 What would we be doing differently? 06:25.980 --> 06:27.270 So why is that provocative? 06:27.270 --> 06:30.060 Well, because a lot of families like mine 06:30.060 --> 06:31.620 did everything we had in our power, 06:31.620 --> 06:33.540 at least at the time with the tools and the science 06:33.540 --> 06:36.513 that we had to keep our loved ones here. 06:37.500 --> 06:38.430 And to hear that suicide 06:38.430 --> 06:40.950 is preventable is really hard for us. 06:40.950 --> 06:41.910 But I like to think of it 06:41.910 --> 06:44.160 just like we do think about cancer. 06:44.160 --> 06:46.320 There's a lot we can do to prevent cancer 06:46.320 --> 06:47.190 from ever happening. 06:47.190 --> 06:48.780 We can clean up our environment. 06:48.780 --> 06:50.550 We can teach people how to eat well. 06:50.550 --> 06:52.650 We can have them never start smoking. 06:52.650 --> 06:54.780 And sometimes people are still gonna get sick. 06:54.780 --> 06:57.000 And when they get sick, we're gonna catch it early. 06:57.000 --> 06:59.040 We're gonna have all kinds of screening programs in place 06:59.040 --> 07:00.300 and we're gonna treat it aggressively 07:00.300 --> 07:01.770 as soon as we identified it, 07:01.770 --> 07:03.780 and hopefully eliminate it before it progresses 07:03.780 --> 07:05.310 to where it's life-threatening. 07:05.310 --> 07:07.680 And sometimes we'll do all of that well, 07:07.680 --> 07:09.300 and people are still gonna get sicker 07:09.300 --> 07:10.230 and we're not gonna stop, 07:10.230 --> 07:12.030 we're gonna continue to give them the best treatment, 07:12.030 --> 07:14.820 the best science that we have to bear. 07:14.820 --> 07:17.250 And sometimes, despite all of our efforts, 07:17.250 --> 07:19.200 we might still lose people, 07:19.200 --> 07:20.790 but we don't get all ruffled 07:20.790 --> 07:23.820 when we hear we are gonna eradicate cancer. 07:23.820 --> 07:25.710 That is a valuable goal. 07:25.710 --> 07:26.790 That's what we're trying to achieve 07:26.790 --> 07:29.100 with suicide prevention as well. 07:29.100 --> 07:31.694 The second provocative thing I want you to think about 07:31.694 --> 07:35.580 is mental health is different from physical health. 07:35.580 --> 07:37.500 Mental health is different from physical health. 07:37.500 --> 07:39.900 Well, at some point in our collective thinking, 07:39.900 --> 07:41.460 the brain left the body. 07:41.460 --> 07:42.930 The brain is certainly a part of a body, 07:42.930 --> 07:44.190 and everything that's going on in the brain 07:44.190 --> 07:46.110 is affecting the body and vice versa. 07:46.110 --> 07:48.360 But we treat these things very differently. 07:48.360 --> 07:50.160 When I show up and I've got a broken arm 07:50.160 --> 07:53.970 or a gash in my leg, empathy and support is automatic. 07:53.970 --> 07:56.070 But when I have that same level of pain, 07:56.070 --> 07:58.080 but it's internal and you can't see it, 07:58.080 --> 07:59.520 instead of getting empathy and support, 07:59.520 --> 08:02.193 I often get judgment and prejudice. 08:02.193 --> 08:05.490 The many ways that this shows up in our healthcare systems, 08:05.490 --> 08:08.100 in our peer support, in our friends, schools, 08:08.100 --> 08:12.090 and workplaces is devastating an added level of injury 08:12.090 --> 08:14.240 to people who are fighting for their lives. 08:15.720 --> 08:17.040 The last thing I want you to think about 08:17.040 --> 08:19.050 in terms of unpacking your beliefs 08:19.050 --> 08:21.180 is this idea that talking about suicide 08:21.180 --> 08:23.220 can put an idea in someone's head, 08:23.220 --> 08:26.130 talking about suicide can put an idea in someone's head. 08:26.130 --> 08:27.720 Now what I've learned about people 08:27.720 --> 08:30.750 who are harboring suicidal thoughts is it's not only 08:30.750 --> 08:33.750 the pain and the fear of holding those thoughts, 08:33.750 --> 08:36.030 but it's also the tremendous feeling of isolation 08:36.030 --> 08:37.350 that accompanies them. 08:37.350 --> 08:39.060 The fear that no one's gonna understand 08:39.060 --> 08:40.590 that they're gonna be judged. 08:40.590 --> 08:42.180 So when someone reaches out and says, 08:42.180 --> 08:45.545 I've noticed it would be understandable 08:45.545 --> 08:47.310 if you're thinking about suicide. 08:47.310 --> 08:49.440 I'm wondering if that's true for me, for you. 08:49.440 --> 08:51.090 How can I help you? 08:51.090 --> 08:53.597 That experience of connection and empathy 08:53.597 --> 08:57.123 does so much to reduce that anxiety of being alone. 08:58.170 --> 09:00.870 So reaching out and using direct language about suicide 09:00.870 --> 09:03.003 is comforting and connecting for people. 09:04.200 --> 09:06.480 That said, there are ways that we talk about suicide 09:06.480 --> 09:09.990 all the time publicly that do increase vulnerability 09:09.990 --> 09:13.470 for people who are already thinking about suicide. 09:13.470 --> 09:15.780 We're not planting suicide ideas in their head, 09:15.780 --> 09:18.750 but when we talk about suicide in ways that it glamorize it 09:18.750 --> 09:21.690 or romanticize it, or we talk too much about means, 09:21.690 --> 09:24.210 or places, or death scenes, or whatever, 09:24.210 --> 09:26.940 sometimes people over identify with that story 09:26.940 --> 09:29.550 and they become more at risk themselves. 09:29.550 --> 09:31.050 So the second thing that we need to do 09:31.050 --> 09:32.520 is really increase our knowledge. 09:32.520 --> 09:34.680 We need to increase our knowledge and our skills 09:34.680 --> 09:38.190 on how to have these conversations with people in our lives, 09:38.190 --> 09:42.030 our classmates, our coworkers, our teammates, our neighbors. 09:42.030 --> 09:44.460 We need to understand that people are much more likely 09:44.460 --> 09:47.880 to die by suicide than motor vehicle accidents, 09:47.880 --> 09:49.560 than breast cancer. 09:49.560 --> 09:50.910 We need to bring out these issues 09:50.910 --> 09:52.170 like we do other health issues 09:52.170 --> 09:55.980 and raise them up as priorities in our communities. 09:55.980 --> 09:58.080 It's not just about awareness. 09:58.080 --> 10:00.660 I mean, we knew for decades that smoking was bad for us 10:00.660 --> 10:02.670 before we did anything to change. 10:02.670 --> 10:04.020 We need to move hearts. 10:04.020 --> 10:05.520 We need to change policies. 10:05.520 --> 10:07.170 And we need to develop skills 10:07.170 --> 10:09.960 that give people the tools to really change this. 10:09.960 --> 10:13.140 Alright, that's light number one, starting with self. 10:13.140 --> 10:15.060 Then we gotta shine that light out 10:15.060 --> 10:17.468 and we gotta figure out how to cultivate hope. 10:17.468 --> 10:21.540 Because hope really is the antidote to suicide. 10:21.540 --> 10:23.893 You can think about your own life challenges, 10:23.893 --> 10:26.910 and if you had a glimmer of hope on the periphery, 10:26.910 --> 10:28.770 you were much more likely to persist 10:28.770 --> 10:32.250 than if you were standing in a dark room with no way out. 10:32.250 --> 10:33.930 So there's this model developed 10:33.930 --> 10:37.920 by an international thought leader named Dr. Thomas Joiner, 10:37.920 --> 10:40.590 who wrote the book, "Why People Die by Suicide". 10:40.590 --> 10:42.210 And he looked at all the warning signs 10:42.210 --> 10:44.280 and risk factors associated with suicide 10:44.280 --> 10:45.900 and there were hundreds of them, 10:45.900 --> 10:48.270 and he boiled them down to these three common pathways. 10:48.270 --> 10:51.472 I'm gonna highlight two 'cause they really inform hope. 10:51.472 --> 10:54.766 One is about perceived burdensomeness. 10:54.766 --> 10:58.380 People who are suicidal often feel 10:58.380 --> 11:01.050 like they become a burden to the people who love them. 11:01.050 --> 11:03.127 Their thought process is this, 11:03.127 --> 11:06.450 "My death is worth more to the people who love me 11:06.450 --> 11:07.620 than my life is." 11:07.620 --> 11:09.780 Now, this turns conventional wisdom on its head, right? 11:09.780 --> 11:13.039 People always say, "Ah, such a selfish act, suicide." 11:13.039 --> 11:15.240 Not to the people who are suicidal. 11:15.240 --> 11:16.557 In their minds, 11:16.557 --> 11:19.560 they believe they're doing everybody a favor. 11:19.560 --> 11:21.750 It's a selfless act. 11:21.750 --> 11:23.490 They believe that everybody's gonna be better off 11:23.490 --> 11:24.420 if they're not here. 11:24.420 --> 11:25.590 And you can think about the many ways 11:25.590 --> 11:28.020 that people come to think that they're a burden, 11:28.020 --> 11:30.900 whether it's an illness, or a financial problem, 11:30.900 --> 11:33.240 or they've done something that's humiliating, 11:33.240 --> 11:35.130 they've made a mistake, they've failed, 11:35.130 --> 11:36.603 there's been a divorce. 11:38.100 --> 11:39.600 The word perceived is important 11:39.600 --> 11:40.950 because when people are in the throes 11:40.950 --> 11:43.350 of a mental health condition like depression, 11:43.350 --> 11:46.290 very often their world kind comes down 11:46.290 --> 11:47.970 to a very narrow tunnel. 11:47.970 --> 11:50.700 And the ability to generate solutions and problems 11:50.700 --> 11:52.800 and see themselves from an objective standpoint 11:52.800 --> 11:54.538 is compromised. 11:54.538 --> 11:57.930 So, but this is their reality, perceived burdensomeness. 11:57.930 --> 12:01.440 The second part is what he called thwarted belongingness. 12:01.440 --> 12:04.733 We are hardwired to be in relationship with other people. 12:04.733 --> 12:07.530 And when those inner circle folks are taken away from us 12:07.530 --> 12:09.930 through death, moving, getting kicked outta school, 12:09.930 --> 12:13.143 losing a job, incarceration, separation, 12:14.070 --> 12:16.290 it also increases suicide thoughts. 12:16.290 --> 12:20.190 So if these are some of the drivers for suicidal despair, 12:20.190 --> 12:22.674 then the opposite is protection. 12:22.674 --> 12:25.830 So instead of burdensomeness, we have purpose, 12:25.830 --> 12:28.713 instead of isolation, we have belonging. 12:29.580 --> 12:31.620 So when we cultivate hope in our communities, 12:31.620 --> 12:32.700 especially our communities 12:32.700 --> 12:34.680 that have increased vulnerability, 12:34.680 --> 12:37.470 let's think about how to renew a sense of purpose 12:37.470 --> 12:39.303 and how to have genuine connection. 12:41.190 --> 12:43.890 The last light that we need to shine 12:43.890 --> 12:47.640 needs to be that beacon to bring people into the movement. 12:47.640 --> 12:52.023 Now, in 2001, my father was diagnosed with prostate cancer. 12:53.640 --> 12:58.527 And when he told me he whispered it, "I have cancer." 12:59.850 --> 13:02.250 Now, my father was brought up in an era 13:02.250 --> 13:03.690 where cancer was understood 13:03.690 --> 13:05.940 as something you brought upon yourself, 13:05.940 --> 13:09.390 some kind of moral failing, something that you did, 13:09.390 --> 13:11.040 and it was a death sentence. 13:11.040 --> 13:14.280 So my father had tremendous amounts of fear, shame, 13:14.280 --> 13:16.920 and hopelessness around his diagnosis. 13:16.920 --> 13:20.460 I was brought up in an era where you kicked cancer's butt, 13:20.460 --> 13:22.650 you caught it early, you did everything in your power, 13:22.650 --> 13:24.630 and there were tons and tons of stories 13:24.630 --> 13:26.373 of successful recovery. 13:28.620 --> 13:32.850 Also in 2001, I had given birth to my second child, Tanner, 13:32.850 --> 13:34.800 and I had put on some weight from the pregnancy 13:34.800 --> 13:37.260 that I was interested in getting rid of. 13:37.260 --> 13:39.000 And someone suggested to me, 13:39.000 --> 13:41.460 there's this three day walk for breast cancer. 13:41.460 --> 13:42.420 Why don't we train for it? 13:42.420 --> 13:44.070 And I thought, yeah, that'll get me back in shape. 13:44.070 --> 13:45.570 Let's do that. 13:45.570 --> 13:47.850 I had no connection to breast cancer. 13:47.850 --> 13:50.250 I had no one close to me that had been affected. 13:50.250 --> 13:53.702 I signed up for this walk because I wanted to get in shape, 13:53.702 --> 13:58.702 and I showed up for this incredible 60 mile three-day trek 13:59.040 --> 14:03.299 from CSU, Colorado State University to CU Boulder. 14:03.299 --> 14:05.220 And I showed up at the start line 14:05.220 --> 14:10.220 and there were 3000 mostly women walking alongside me. 14:10.680 --> 14:13.618 Many of them had handkerchiefs on their head 14:13.618 --> 14:15.872 from recovering from chemo, 14:15.872 --> 14:19.440 countless people carrying balloons of butterflies, 14:19.440 --> 14:22.969 and stars, and hearts honoring their loved ones. 14:22.969 --> 14:25.851 And when I look back at those experiences, 14:25.851 --> 14:27.330 now that I'm in the throes 14:27.330 --> 14:28.920 of the suicide prevention movement, 14:28.920 --> 14:31.290 I think there's a lot we can learn 14:31.290 --> 14:32.400 from the breast cancer movement. 14:32.400 --> 14:34.500 They got a lot of things right. 14:34.500 --> 14:37.440 We can stand in solidarity with people who are fighting 14:37.440 --> 14:38.737 for their lives and say, 14:38.737 --> 14:40.287 "I will walk with you." 14:41.850 --> 14:44.190 And we can lift up the people who have passed 14:44.190 --> 14:46.503 and honor them with dignity and respect. 14:47.460 --> 14:52.413 And we can say the words loudly, directly, and deal with it. 14:53.490 --> 14:56.070 So it's important to engage this wider circle. 14:56.070 --> 14:57.930 And the way that we can do that 14:57.930 --> 14:59.610 is through organized empowerment. 14:59.610 --> 15:01.200 Now, these pictures below, 15:01.200 --> 15:04.800 I am thrilled to say were just taken a couple months ago 15:04.800 --> 15:07.950 at the Washington DC Monument Mall, 15:07.950 --> 15:11.220 a hundreds of us gathered to march in solidarity 15:11.220 --> 15:14.880 to demand dignity for people who are struggling 15:14.880 --> 15:18.210 and challenged by mental health conditions. 15:18.210 --> 15:20.910 And it's really important that we come together 15:20.910 --> 15:22.320 and lift up the voices, 15:22.320 --> 15:25.980 the voices who have lived experience with these issues, 15:25.980 --> 15:27.600 lived experience with recovery, 15:27.600 --> 15:30.060 lived experience with the barriers and challenges 15:30.060 --> 15:33.900 that people face every day when they fight for their lives. 15:33.900 --> 15:36.450 These people have often been rendered voiceless, 15:36.450 --> 15:39.540 pushed to the sides, marginalized, discriminated against, 15:39.540 --> 15:42.270 and yet they hold the key; 15:42.270 --> 15:44.190 it's the black box of how to understand 15:44.190 --> 15:46.260 how to recover from this. 15:46.260 --> 15:49.650 And when we lift up these voices, magic starts to happen. 15:49.650 --> 15:51.240 People see hope. 15:51.240 --> 15:54.926 They see promise that recovery is possible. 15:54.926 --> 15:59.373 We also need to enroll these stakeholders, business leaders, 16:00.420 --> 16:04.710 faith community leaders, educational leaders, 16:04.710 --> 16:06.750 to not only take this on as a priority 16:06.750 --> 16:11.377 that they're champion, but also to raise their hand and say, 16:11.377 --> 16:13.950 "Me too, me too. 16:13.950 --> 16:16.530 My life has been affected by these issues 16:16.530 --> 16:19.830 and I am with you and I will fight along with you." 16:19.830 --> 16:20.670 It's been really exciting, 16:20.670 --> 16:21.570 we've been working quite a bit 16:21.570 --> 16:23.280 with the Denver Fire Department 16:23.280 --> 16:26.160 who came to acknowledge like in the national landscape 16:26.160 --> 16:28.830 that they'd have more firefighters die by suicide 16:28.830 --> 16:30.030 than line of duty deaths. 16:30.030 --> 16:32.220 This has been a fact we've known for a long time, 16:32.220 --> 16:35.280 but recently the first responder community 16:35.280 --> 16:37.410 has taken attention to this. 16:37.410 --> 16:39.037 And when I went to start partnering with them, I said, 16:39.037 --> 16:39.870 "Who's out? 16:39.870 --> 16:41.040 Who's talking about recovery? 16:41.040 --> 16:42.240 And I don't really care from what? 16:42.240 --> 16:44.250 Who is sharing stories of hope 16:44.250 --> 16:45.150 that you can get through this?" 16:45.150 --> 16:46.590 And they said, "Nobody. 16:46.590 --> 16:47.700 Why would anybody do that? 16:47.700 --> 16:52.700 We depend on each other's lives to be mentally resilient." 16:52.800 --> 16:55.440 And I said, "Well, sadly, until people see that story, 16:55.440 --> 16:57.480 nobody's gonna believe it's possible." 16:57.480 --> 17:01.470 It took them a year and a half to develop the courage. 17:01.470 --> 17:04.380 These men and women run into burning buildings 17:04.380 --> 17:06.900 to develop the courage to come out with their stories. 17:06.900 --> 17:09.210 And when they did all the way from the chief, 17:09.210 --> 17:10.980 to the assistant chief, captains, lieutenants, 17:10.980 --> 17:13.260 and firefighters, it changed the landscape. 17:13.260 --> 17:16.587 It provided permission for people to say, "Me too." 17:17.580 --> 17:19.320 So how do we act against this injustice? 17:19.320 --> 17:22.632 How do we lift these voices and create social change? 17:22.632 --> 17:24.900 All right, I want to have some help 17:24.900 --> 17:26.100 in bringing down the lights. 17:26.100 --> 17:27.150 And as I do that, 17:27.150 --> 17:29.730 grab the flashlights that are on your table. 17:29.730 --> 17:31.621 And if you don't have the flashlights, 17:31.621 --> 17:34.230 what I want you to do is pull out your phones. 17:34.230 --> 17:35.940 We're gonna use those as lights. 17:35.940 --> 17:37.800 And everybody's gonna bring the house lights 17:37.800 --> 17:38.820 to completely dark. 17:38.820 --> 17:41.700 Can I get that door shut in the back please? 17:41.700 --> 17:43.110 And we're gonna pull these lights down. 17:43.110 --> 17:43.943 Go ahead. 17:43.943 --> 17:44.776 All the way down. 17:44.776 --> 17:45.760 Dark, dark, dark, dark, dark. 17:47.100 --> 17:51.030 Okay, so I experienced my own depression 17:51.030 --> 17:52.620 in the spring of 2012. 17:52.620 --> 17:55.050 I had a perfect storm of life events happening. 17:55.050 --> 17:56.610 I was vulnerable in a number of ways, 17:56.610 --> 17:59.190 and I was just brought to my knees. 17:59.190 --> 18:02.400 And the experience of the depression that I had 18:02.400 --> 18:03.233 felt like this. 18:03.233 --> 18:06.240 Being in this dark room, there's no way out, 18:06.240 --> 18:08.040 there's no hope on the horizon, 18:08.040 --> 18:10.597 and feeling terribly isolated, and alone. 18:10.597 --> 18:12.300 And this is the common experience 18:12.300 --> 18:13.440 that I also hear from people 18:13.440 --> 18:15.600 who are suicide attempt survivors. 18:15.600 --> 18:17.190 Now I'm gonna ask you to light your lights, 18:17.190 --> 18:18.720 whether it's the flashlight of the phone 18:18.720 --> 18:21.630 in response to some prompts that I'm gonna give you. 18:21.630 --> 18:23.430 And when I do, go ahead and lift them up. 18:23.430 --> 18:24.263 All right? 18:24.263 --> 18:27.210 So my first prompt is, if you are a suicide loss survivor, 18:27.210 --> 18:29.190 go ahead and raise your lights. 18:29.190 --> 18:31.050 If you've lost someone you love to suicide, 18:31.050 --> 18:34.860 whether it's a friend, family member, coworker, classmate, 18:34.860 --> 18:36.990 teammate, neighbor, thank you. 18:36.990 --> 18:38.190 Hold them up. 18:38.190 --> 18:40.020 You are all shining lights of hope 18:40.020 --> 18:42.150 because when the fanfare goes away 18:42.150 --> 18:43.830 and the resources dry up, 18:43.830 --> 18:46.230 we are all there carrying the flag forward 18:46.230 --> 18:48.660 making meaning out of our loss and saying, 18:48.660 --> 18:52.080 not one more life to lose. 18:52.080 --> 18:54.540 Thank you. Put your lights down. 18:54.540 --> 18:57.930 If you yourself or with someone you love 18:57.930 --> 19:00.990 have ever walked through that long, dark night of the soul 19:00.990 --> 19:04.380 of being depressed, anxious, experiencing trauma, 19:04.380 --> 19:05.880 list your lights up. 19:05.880 --> 19:10.350 Anytime, feeling overwhelmed, suicidal, scared, 19:10.350 --> 19:11.534 huge life challenges? 19:11.534 --> 19:12.600 Thank you. 19:12.600 --> 19:16.290 You are all shining lights of hope, keep 'em up. 19:16.290 --> 19:17.123 Thank you. 19:17.123 --> 19:20.070 Because when others are in that place of despair, 19:20.070 --> 19:22.477 you can walk alongside them and you can say, 19:22.477 --> 19:24.450 "I don't know exactly what you're going through, 19:24.450 --> 19:27.240 but maybe I've experienced something similar 19:27.240 --> 19:29.580 and I have some ideas and I'm with you 19:29.580 --> 19:30.960 and I will walk with you." 19:30.960 --> 19:32.880 Okay, go ahead and put your lights down. 19:32.880 --> 19:35.340 Now, if you are supporting 19:35.340 --> 19:36.660 the mental health promotion movement 19:36.660 --> 19:39.450 and the suicide prevention movement for any reason at all, 19:39.450 --> 19:40.920 go ahead and you'll lift your lights up. 19:40.920 --> 19:42.540 Every light should be up. 19:42.540 --> 19:43.980 Okay, very good. 19:43.980 --> 19:45.180 Raise them proudly. 19:45.180 --> 19:48.504 Now imagine you are that person in that dark room, 19:48.504 --> 19:51.630 feeling isolated, alone, and afraid, 19:51.630 --> 19:56.550 and you look up and you see all of these lights around you. 19:56.550 --> 19:59.070 I am with you. I will not leave you. 19:59.070 --> 20:00.420 I have some ideas. 20:00.420 --> 20:02.013 We'll get through this together. 20:02.013 --> 20:04.110 You provide the hope. 20:04.110 --> 20:05.710 Okay, thank you. Lights back up. 20:07.650 --> 20:11.640 So in closing, I just wanna say thank you all 20:11.640 --> 20:13.470 for being shining lights of hope. 20:13.470 --> 20:15.720 You are the beacons to this movement. 20:15.720 --> 20:18.180 Your light shines brightly so that others can see 20:18.180 --> 20:21.630 and be illuminated into their own misperceptions. 20:21.630 --> 20:24.076 So thank you so much for being part of it. 20:24.076 --> 20:26.659 (upbeat music)